Two People With One Bar Stand to Cower Behind
by ByTheWayYou'reHair'sOnFire
Summary: Esposito and Kensi are both very picky when it comes to dates...


**Okay, so this is a continuation of last night's episode of NCIS LA. Except she meets someone special... I'l give you a hint, he's a cop and his name is in the story description! (ooh, hard to guess now, isn't it?) I made this about him because there are a lot of stories about Caskett, but what about everybody else? **

Kensi was, at the moment, hiding under the bar. She was a rough, tough, knock-you-sensless cop, who was hiding from... a lady she just met at the bar. Let's see how it came to this. Well, it started out as a case. And then Jamie saved her life (from his cowering position under the car, where he had taken cover) and she took him out for a drink. As a kind of thank-you. Then the dude's mother shows up, talking-_ happily _talking- about how she's his girlfriend. A bit much for a first date. And now, killer kensi, is squatting behind the bar, in hopes of 'out of sight, out of mind.'

He left for the bar. He told her he was going to get them drinks... again. His only excuse left. He tried the someone's-calling-me-gotta-go thing, but his phone ended up being dead. How could she even see that it was dead? He shook his head to himself. His explanation was that he 'thought he heard it ring'. Pathetic. He leaned over the bar, about to order another margarita (though, to be honest, he'd never finished his first) and noticed a chick muttering curses to herself behind the counter. As in crouching behind the counter.

"You alright?" Esposito asked.

She pressed a finger to her lips urgently. "I'm hiding... from my date's mom."

"Ah." Esposito nodded understandingly. He glanced back at his own date, who was just waiting for him, so that she could attack him with words again. "In that case, I might as well join you."

She made space and the two sat in companionable silence for a couple seconds, before she turned and whispered, "She's crazy, man... but I think the guy lead her on. She's talking about kids! On a first date! You know that's a sign for-"

"Total desperation." Esposito finished for her. She nodded gravely. "Let me guess who your date is... it's that guy." He points to a guy with red hair and freckles. She shook her head and gestured to Jamie. He let out a low whistle. "Unfortunate." He commented. She rolled her eyes. "What about you, huh? Who's your date?" She said 'date' with a singsong voice.

"Oh, uh... over there." He pointed to his sexy, honey blonde hair, dark brown doe-eyes date.

"Hot." Kensi dryly remarked, feeling a bit put out, for some reason, because his date passed hers. "I know right? But... She won't. Stop. Talking." Esposito continued. She laughed. "Don't laugh! You know how we're talking? Like talking- talking?"

"Talking-talking?" Kensi repeated bemusedly.

"You know, normal talking! That's how normal people talk! But all she talks about is how much her purse costs, how much her shoes costs, how much she thinks the drinks will cost!" Esposito ranted. Kensi snickered and Esposito couldn't help but smile as he muttered "Show a little sympathy.

"Yeah, well, at least she's not talking about kids." Kensi pointed out with a pout. He chuckled. "Yeah, the next few hours are going to suuuuuuuuck for you." He checked his watch. "You have, like, three hours of baby talk and fake smiling, can you handle it?"

She frowned. "I don't think so... maybe we could say we're sick?" She suggested hopefully. Esposito shook his head. "Nah, then she'l be all 'how's your girlfriend doing now?' you can't just drop that on the poor guy." "Yeah, well he didn't tell me his mom was coming! I liked it better when I was pretending to be his cousin."

"You were pretending to be his cousin?"

"It's a long story, but yeah."

*fits of silent laughter from Esposito, who ignored several indignant nudges from Kensi*

"You know..." Esposito slowly sobered from bouts of laughter, "You could always say someone's calling you for something important. I tried that, but my phone's dead." She considered that. Then slowly gave him an evil smile.

"I have an even better idea."

-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l

Esposito hauled Kensi by the elbow back to her table, shouting "WHAT THE HELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE GOING OUT WITH SOME GUY, I'M YOUR BIG BROTHER!"

Kensi screamed back, "BECAUSE I KNEW YOU'D ACT LIKE THIS! YOU'RE ALWAYS ACTING LIKE THIS! IT'S OVER PROTECTING AND I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL ANYMORE!"

They caught the attention of Espo's date who walked over, Esposito noticed this and kept shouting. "I WAS JUST OVER HERE HAVING A LOVELY EVENING WITH MY DATE WHEN-"

"OH I SEE, YOU CAN GO ON DATES, JUST NOT ME RIGHT? I SEE HOW IT IS!" Kensi interrupted him.

"Actually, I think it's kind of cute, and so sweet how you protect your sister, Javie." The blonde date cooed, petting Esposito's arm causing both Esposito and Kensi to flush red. Kensi, seeing how lost for words Esposito was, decided to help him out by screaming "THAT'S IT, I'M GOING RIGHT NOW TO PERSONALLY TALK TO MOM!" He caught on quick, shouting "NOT IF I TALK TO MOM FIRST!" And the two race out the door.

Once safely in the car they burst out laughing. "ha, ha... you are way too protective big brother!" Kensi snorted. "Running to mom, little sis?" Esposito quipped through his laughter.

Then she stopped, giving him a fearful glance. "This is your car, right?" He nodded, not seeing the problem. "Well then, what's your date going to go home in?" Esposito's knuckles went white as he turned to her in horror. He did NOT want to go back there again. Then he relaxed as they both concluded,

"She can get a cab."

End.

**As for the red hair and freckles thing, it's kind of a joke because in 'the backup plan' the guy who plays Deeks kept predicting that Jenifer Lopez would have babies with red hair and freckles. I hope you liked it... and I don't own NCIS LA or Castle. If I did I'd be writing this in my mansion, *leans back hands behind head*... except that I don't *Crashes to reality, hands no longer behind head* But please R&R Anyways!**


End file.
